Okay, so it’s unquestionably arrogant to post a page featuring my writing awards. But what else am I supposed to do with them? I figured since I tout myself as an “award winning” writer, I’d better offer up some hard proof.
Once upon a time I had an office in New York City, and I hung all my writing awards on the wall. Visitors would look at them and seem impressed, but I always felt like kind of a pretentious douchebag afterwards. I have an office in New Jersey now, but I haven’t hung my awards on the wall…just pictures my kids drew. It’s a much cooler office.
You’ll probably notice that most of these awards are almost twenty years old. Why haven’t I won anything in since 1995? Because I suck now!
Also, in 1996, I left my full-time job as a newspaper journalist to become a magazine editor. Since I was no longer on the newspaper staff, my stuff was no longer eligible for the local journalism competitions. You gotta be in it, to win it!
Anyway here’s a quick visual tour of my various awards: